Top Ten Observations Upon The Jewish New Year

10.  God is still annoyed with me.

9.   Hipsters now popping up in services.  Black skullcaps very slimming.

8.   Noah requested a flood to clean things up because Swiffer not yet invented.

7.   Getting a surgeon on Rosh Hashanah demonstrates the mighty power of prayer.

6.   Don’t blow a shofar if you have bus fare.

5.   When I don’t remember the liturgical music I just ccchhhhum along.

4.   Microphone spit-screen sales are through the roof (see # 5)

3.   The quietest babies are the unborn ones.

2.   “The Rosh Hashanah Murders” – name of future novel inspired by behavior of teens during temple services

1.   Delivering English readings with strong sarcastic tone is refreshing and feels much truer (see # 10).

RoshHashanah--JerusalemNewYear_001

This entry was posted in Funny Irreverent Stuff and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Top Ten Observations Upon The Jewish New Year

  1. doolinpup@aol.com says:

    Enjoyed them all, especially # 5.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s