Fly On A Ritzy Wall

I try to imagine the private goings-on of famous, powerful people.

  • Bill Gates has a custom laptop with an ivory keyboard.  (It’s a Mac Pro.)
  • Chris Christie complains to his wife:  “People ask ‘what exit?’  I need three.”

    Maybe more.

    Maybe more.

  • Barbara Walters makes duck-faces in the mirror while saying “Ba ba ba ba Wa wa wa wa”.  Then, “I thoa wish I had had another child.”  (Hey Baba Wawa, the unborn children of the world thank you very much.)
  • Ann Coulter sleeps with a teddy bear.
  • Donald Trump picks his nose and has it framed.  Or set in a ring with channeled diamonds, for his wife, Melanomia.

    There's gold in there!

    There’s gold in there!

  • A confused Bill Cosby cleans his ears with pudding pops.Bill Cosby pudding pop cartoon
  • Whitney Cummings counts leis to fall asleep.  If still awake, she counts blowjobs, a much larger number for her.
  • Sarah Palin scissors with Ann Coulter.  Then shoots her teddy bear.
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