Tag Archives: dating

Don’t hate me because I’m lovable

Why has no one yet opened a chain of comedy club/restaurants with Hooters-style waitresses and called it “Titters”? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Emotions are like breasts. They’re meant to be felt. Also if you try hard, you can lick an emotion. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ My … Continue reading

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Seminal Sunday Stream

If the majority of history’s greatest writers had been potheads instead of drunks, we’d have far fewer books. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ If Ogden Nash were alive, he’d write: “Trump has won / Clinton didn’t get it done / I will not bicker … Continue reading

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If You Can Afford A Life Coach, Then You Might Not Need One

I saw in the news that an Airbnb was built on an old Native American burial ground. The giveaway for the reporter was a hotel manager with the name tag Sheets Like Sandpaper. *********************************** It’s always better to be funny. If … Continue reading

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Atheist Kids Want Mall Grinch

I wonder if Grinch and Shrek were in the same play group as toddlers. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Today’s medications get stuck in your throat just saying them.  Zaljang? Zolmitriptan?  Zackackackackackackack!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ If I were young, I’d move to Denver to start a … Continue reading

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Clap For Dogs

I was having the following thoughts the other morning before getting out of bed. Dogs are wonderful people.  (I have believed this for a long time, despite never having owned a dog.)  They do so much for humans, and are … Continue reading

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