Tag Archives: tits

Major Crwnage

Older women are like fine wine. They deserve to be drunk. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I hate when you’re trying to throw away a Styrofoam peanut and it keeps sticking to your hand. I also hate knowing that 45 years ago, this would have … Continue reading

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Don’t hate me because I’m lovable

Why has no one yet opened a chain of comedy club/restaurants with Hooters-style waitresses and called it “Titters”? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Emotions are like breasts. They’re meant to be felt. Also if you try hard, you can lick an emotion. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ My … Continue reading

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I’m not a Schadenfreudist, but I like watching them on TV

Not to be outdone in the kinky department, BET is releasing a movie titled “Fifty Shades of Ashy.” **************************** Confucius said, “Man who doesn’t wash hands after bathroom not wise man.” My Vietnamese nail lady says, “Skinny guys good for … Continue reading

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I Heart One-Liners

IBS also keeps my mind clear. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Why do I need a colonoscopy?  My ass gets checked out every day. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ My neighborhood is a high crime area.  Bitches be gettin’ high there all the time. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Why have I … Continue reading

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