Tag Archives: Twitter

Standing in my filth: Pig-Pen’s memoir channeled through a lazy housewife

Here’s the main difference between me and the Queen of England: she insists that workers in Buckingham palace walk backwards as they vacuum, so that they don’t leave any footprints. I don’t vacuum. They say it can be deeply disturbing … Continue reading

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Nasty Senior Citizen Subtweets

Old_Yeller @yellholes                            4/15/14 Stop lying to the IRS ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Madge @wigs4us                                 … Continue reading

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The Annihilation of Bacon (And Other Modern Horrors)

Physics For Dummies:  Why Do Kids Wear Shorts In The Winter?  Because they’re out of touch with reality, that’s why.  It finally struck me that the reason we see so many kids dressed inappropriately (for the weather) is because they’ve … Continue reading

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It’s Always Good To Get a SHORTY…Let’s Help MARY DIMINO Do Just That!

In hockey, a shorty is a short-handed goal.  This occurs during a penalty-kill, and is always very thrilling.  Especially when it’s your kid sitting in the penalty box after having committed a rather, er, short-sighted, er, action, against another kid … Continue reading

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